Saturday, January 7, 2006

Chains of Fools

From Planned Parenthood of Connecticut's online shop, here's the latest fashion in U.S. taxpayer-subsidized "condom key chains":

"Condoms are cheaper than diapers." Well, that settles it, doesn't it? And look at that monstrous crying baby. Who says that Planned Parenthood is relativist? They believe in evil, all right. It's just that their idea of evil weighs 8 lbs., 6 oz., and gains its sustenance from a breast.

At any rate, if we're going to be utilitarian, e-mailing your senators and your representative is cheaper than phoning them to tell them to quit spending your tax dollars encouraging teenagers to have sex with multiple partners under the delusion that they are "safe."

In the words of Maxed Out Mama:
One commonly accepted figure is that proper and consistent use of condoms will lower a woman's chance of getting pregnant to 3% in one year.

Sounds good, until you do this simple calculation. If you have a 3% risk in one year, your risk over 5 years is 15%, and over 10 years it's 30%. [M.O.M.'s odds are not exact, but the odds of being impregnated while using condoms do accumulate significantly over time, an issue that the Planned Parenthood-funded experts who compile statistics at the Alan Guttmacher Institute appear unwilling to broach—Ed.]....Now it is easier to get pregnant than to get a veneral disease (the process isn't specifically designed to transmit disease, but it sure is designed to get a woman pregnant), so condoms are better at preventing venereal disease than pregnancy.

BUT getting many venereal diseases increases the chance for getting another, so risks balloon for the more sexually active people. [More on Maxed Out Mama's site.]
More from the Planned Parenthood catalog—you worked hard to finance this, so you might as well see it:

It's an image of an idol holding a condom, with the slogan, "Immunity idol for real survivors." Gotta give them credit for truth in advertising—at least the idol part.

Last but not least:

What could God be saying to Adam in this version of Michelangelo's masterpiece? Suggestions welcome in the comments section below.

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The Planned Parenthood Federation of America's annual report shows that it received over a quarter-billion dollars in taxpayer funding in fiscal 2004. That money is fungible; it enables the organization to spend more money on condom key chains as well as on abortions. If you do not want to see your tax dollars spent on such things, contact your senators or your representative.